Being a successful real estate investor means being a successful negotiator. Being a successful negotiator is not easy, but it is a skill that can be learned.
Browsing one of my favorite websites the other day I came upon some valuable negotiating advice and thought I would pass it along.
SILENCE
The most powerful words are silent.
I had a dinner with Michael Fishman (cc Monica McCarthy) last week. He said, “if even for one second you are preparing your response while someone else is talking, then you aren’t listening.”
That’s pretty wise, Michael!
My technique is this. Someone talks. I count to two. Then I prepare my response and not before then.
Very valuable advice!
During negotiations, our minds can race ahead. We want the deal! But by not listening we may actually lose the deal. We will never hear what the other person actually wants or needs and we instead craft the deal to what we think they want or need.
Give this technique a try. Your silence can be golden.
Dennis says
I think that’s a pretty good advise, there situations we should wait at least a 1 min before we formulate the correct reply and avoid regretting it later.
Thanks,
Dennis
Kevin says
Dennis, you are right. Sometime we may need to wait a bit longer and gather our thoughts. Thanks for reading and commenting,
Kevin
Paul Wurster says
My wife is the master of this technique. She uses it on contractors all of the time. If she points out work that is wrong or poor, they will often make excuses, and she will remain quiet. They can never tolerate the silence. They soon talk themselves into a remediation plan.
Kevin says
Paul,
Love it! Will have to try that.
Thanks for the tip and for reading,
Kevin
Kelvin Wong says
Great advice, Kevin. God gave us two ears and one mouth but most people speak twice as much as they listen! Yes, me included and I have to constantly remind myself to listen twice as much as I speak.
Kevin says
Kelvin,
So do I, so do I!
Thanks for taking the time to read and comment,
Kevin
Wendy says
SIlence is key in negotiations. Too often we ask a question or make an offer and then we keep on talking and often we talk ourselves out of a deal or by defending our position too vigorously, we show our weakness or our desperation. Be very comfortable with silence when negotiating. Say your piece, then keep your peace… and listen.
Lamar says
Have you ever negotiated into a situation where the first one to speak loses. At that point silence is truly golden.